My family of 6 fled Ukraine and spent 10 days traveling to Ireland. The journey showed us both the w

• Artem (not his real name) is a 43-year-old Ukrainian refugee currently staying in Cork, Ireland.
• He fled his home in Lyiv, Ukraine on February 25 with his wife and four children aged 6 to 10.
• This is his story, as told to writer Jenn Morson. 

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with a Ukrainian refugee in Ireland who asked to remain anonymous to protect his privacy, but his identity and claims in this story have been verified by Insider. The conversation has been edited for length and clarity.

On February 23, we hosted a birthday party for my daughter. During dinner, we joked at the table, "Maybe Russia will invade tomorrow!" We didn't really mean it. No one thought it would happen so soon.

At that point, we knew that Putin was sending Russian troops toward Eastern Ukraine, but still didn't expect things to escalate so quickly. 

The next morning, I got a message from a coworker that two or three bombs hit 20 kilometers from my house, which is near our workplace. But still, we wondered and hoped it was just a one-time action.

On February 25, we realized it was not going to stop

Many people had started to move away. We called a lot of our friends, and five of them were already on their way out of the country. They told us, you have small children. You need to save their lives.

In such a situation, there's no time to think. You must make a quick decision and act. I'm the father of four children, and we didn't have a basement or a safe place to hide in. So I decided that morning to move my family from Lviv, our home city, to Poland. 

We didn't know where we'd go once we got there, but for the time being we knew we needed to leave.

Lviv is in Western Ukraine and over seven hours by car away from the capital Kyiv. Lviv is a patriotic city and a big center of Ukrainian culture, so we feared it would be one of Russia's main targets. We'd just built our home three years ago. It's a small, nice home for our family, close to my work, and close to the school where my wife teaches. We live a regular Ukrainian life.

We're a family of 6 but only have one car with five seats

We crammed into the car with some food, warm tea in thermoses, some cash, identification, and my computer. We locked the door and left a key with the neighbor because he was not allowed to leave. At that time, men between the ages of 18 and 60 were not allowed to leave, and so my plan was to drive my family to the border and let them cross. My wife and children were so worried and crying, but I wanted them to be safe.

As we arrived near the Polish border at Medyka, there was a line of cars that was at a complete standstill. When we joined the line, my GPS showed that we were still 12 kilometers, or about seven miles, away from the border. 

Every 15 minutes, the line would move by maybe five to 10 meters, or 15 to 30 feet.

During the night time, my wife and children were allowed to get out of the car and stay in a local school building. They slept on some small chairs, and people brought them sandwiches and hot tea. But I had to stay in the car and I couldn't go to sleep, because if I did, a soldier would knock on my window and tell me to move ahead. Luckily, we were able to refuel to avoid running out of gas, and I mostly turned the car off when we weren't moving. 

This went on for three nights. I became sick from the lack of sleep and from constantly inhaling the exhaust fumes.

And each kilometer, a Ukrainian soldier would check our documents and ask who was in the car and where we were going. When they reiterated that I was not allowed to cross, the children would become upset all over again. I tried to reassure them that it would be OK. 

But by the time we arrived at the border on February 28, President Zelenskyy had passed a law that a father with three or more children under 16 can leave the country with them, so I was allowed to pass. 

It's a funny thing — in moments like these, you see both the worst of people and the best of people

Yes, people kill each other during war, but during this time, people also show the best that a human person can be. The Polish guards were carrying small babies, helping women with their bags, doing anything to help us across the border. And once we were on the other side, there were so many people offering us food, medicine, warm clothing, rides — anything we needed. Just so many regular people offering to help us. 

Once we crossed safely, I called an American friend and asked her if she knew anyone who could take in a family of six. We connected with one family in Krakow and stayed with them for several days.  

As the invasion continued, I realized that there wasn't going to be an 'end' date anytime soon when we could return to our home. I'd initially thought we would stay in Poland because it's easy for Ukrainians to assimilate there, but there were already over two million Ukrainians in Poland and more and more every day. I knew it would be hard to find a permanent home, jobs, or places for the children in school. We had to find somewhere else. 

I started to think, who do I know? My brother is in Spain, but I don't speak Spanish. Then I remembered an old friend in Ireland. I didn't know anything about Ireland, or even if they would accept refugees, but I sent my friend an email and he spoke with a local politician who told him that Ireland would be accepting 20,000 refugees and likely more. We found airline tickets from Krakow to Munich, and then from there we flew to Dublin and arrived on March 7. My friend Damian picked us up and drove us to Cork.

When we arrived in Ireland, we were among the first 1,000 refugees

As of March 21, more than 10,000 Ukrainian refugees have come to Ireland. 

We stayed in a hotel at first and then with a family for five days. We knew that would be temporary as they could not afford to house us long-term. Our friends helped organize others to give us food, clothing, and medicine through their church. 

An older woman was in charge of helping refugees find places to live, and she introduced us to a mother and her children who offered us a home on the third floor of their house with our own bedrooms and bathroom. Next, we plan to find jobs and enroll our children in school.

It feels overwhelming when regular people do things to help us. So many Irish people have helped us — sharing their beds. Everything they have at home, they offer to us. There are Ukrainian flags hanging from windows throughout Cork, expressing their support.

When people realize that we're refugees from Ukraine, many of them ask us what we need. We recently went to a bookstore to get supplies for the children to start school, and the owner of the shop gave us everything we needed for free.

We don't know how long we'll be here

On March 13, more than 30 bombs killed 35 people very close to our home. It's foolish for us to make plans. When I reach out to family and friends from home, they say, "I'm in Germany, I'm in Poland, I'm with my brother, I'm with my friend" — everyone is trying to find shelter somewhere, somehow. 

We hope the war will stop in Ukraine. For now we are OK, but what will happen to the rest of the world?

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